An Exclusive Interview with Kenny Rogers’ Beard

The Beard Coach: Thanks so much for taking the time to be here.  You are an icon.

Kenny Rogers’ Beard: Thank you for having me.  I really like what you’re doing with the website.

TBC: Wow, thanks.  That means a lot.  So let’s cut to the chase… I’ve been a fan since back in the early eighties.  The Gambler, Islands In The Stream… you’ve been there the whole time.  As far as I’m aware, you’ve always been white.  Is that true?

KRB: You know, that’s actually not true.  I was dark brown in my youth.  I’ve just been famous for a long time, and you’re a bit too young to remember the early days.

TBC: I guess that’s true.  But I scoured the Internet looking for a picture of you in a non-white state and I couldn’t find one.

KRB: Well I’ve been around a lot longer than the Internet.

TBC: That’s a good point, Kenny Rogers’ Beard.  Speaking of the Internet, what do you think of menwholooklikekennyrogers.com?

KRB: I think it’s great!  I like to log on every now and then and see who’s paying homage to me, the face I grow on, and my good friend Kenny Rogers’ Hairstyle.  I mean, it’s proof that we all have teamed up for years to create a classic look.

TBC: I wholeheartedly agree.  For years, you were part of a classic style that appealed to many men, but I’d like to bring up a tougher subject if that’s okay.

KRB: Go ahead.

TBC: Unfortunately, in recent years Kenny has undergone several obvious cosmetic surgeries and as a result, he has become the butt of many jokes.  He has even gone so far as to carve you into a goatee from your former full-bodied self.  What has this done to you emotionally?

KRB: (long silence) It’s tough, you know?  I mean, I thought we were looking pretty good, aging gracefully, and then, BAM, I’m under the knife and under the razor and frankly, it stinks.  It makes me feel so helpless.  Kenny and I were so tight for so long, and now it’s like I don’t even know him anymore.

TBC: So what do you do?

KRB: That’s the thing… there’s nothing I can do.  I mean, I’m a beard.

TBC: A beard makes a man look so powerful, but the beard itself is so powerless.  That’s some insight, my friend.  But let’s bring things back to the positive side.  You’re still out there performing.  People are still raging fans.  What’s in store for you?  Retirement soon?

KRB: I’m blessed to have been partnered with a legendary vocal artist, and we’ve achieved a level of success and recognition that most people and their beards never come close to achieving.  Performing is getting pretty stressful on me especially with the changes we just discussed.  But Kenny’s a workaholic.  I’d love to just kick back in the woods of East Texas and reflect, but I doubt I’ll be able to convince Kenny that he might enjoy that as well.  So I guess we’ll just keep on keeping on.

TBC: As a fan I have to admit that’s good to hear.  We’d hate for you to drop out of the spotlight.  Thanks again for sitting down with us today.  It’s been a real treat.

KRB: It’s been a pleasure.

TBC: Say hello to Kenny for me, if you would.

KRB: Of course.

4 comments

  1. The best y sexiest beard in the world in my opinion is Kenny Rogers – ufff.. in the 80’s was hot, hot, hot. – Ahhh… “Kenny you are my fantasy” and I’m only 29, lol…

  2. I can’t believe you scored an interview with Kenny Rogers’ Beard. I think this might give you the clout to interview one of the ZZ Top Beards…. or possibly BOTH.

    1. Lady, the ZZ Top beards may be even more legendary than Kenny Rogers’ beard. I will try my best to score that elusive interview you wish to see. Keep your beard hairs crossed!

      1. I second the vote for an interview with the beards of Billy Gibbons and Dusty (John) Hill (“Yu’p.”) I hope Billy’s beard talks more than he does. Let’s face it; Frank will never grow one.

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